ANALYSIS

lately i've become to be able to analyse my emotions i thought about writing these analyses down

analysis n.1:

anger, repulsion, jealousy

- comes frequently

- very hard to control

trigger: people who make something stupid/not good enough/shallow and are admired for it

rationally the subject knows that these people might not all deserve this strong urge to hate that there could be honesty and something valuable in what they do nevertheless the subject prefers to despise them all and see no difference in them the jealousy comes from the suppressed desire for the admiration they have along with the desperation of being aware that he will never be admired and the shame for even wanting it. note: the subject believes in his strong sense for absolution/perfection and his ability to see and feel noble things

conclusion: if the subject never overcomes his great expectations and his annoyance from what he considers "not good enough" it might become mentally harmful for him the subject needs to spread